Adoption: Facts and Myths

I remember when we first started looking into adoption I thought I knew a lot but was surprised that I had wrong information about some things.

So, today, I'm going to do a little summary of two of the side article links... Adoption Fact Sheet and Adoption Myths. 

I've picked my 5 favorites facts/myths that either were surprising to me or just seem like big ones that people tend to have a lot of misconception about.

1.  Most birth mothers who place their babies for adoption are teenagers.  MYTH.  Actually, most birth mothers who choose adoption are in their early twenties, although women of all ages make this decision.
I have to admit, this is the one that I think I was the most naive about.  Why do we stereotype birth mom's as being teenagers?  The more you learn about how the brain develops, it actually makes a lot of sense that they are not always teenagers.  Teenagers brains are still developing and they don't always have the same maturity which can make that decision even harder.  This is definitely not to say that teenagers don't choose adoption, it's just not the biggest age range.
2.  Interesting FACT:  Children who were adopted as infants have better health, see mental health professionals less often, have fewer behavioral problems, and do better in school than children born outside of marriage and raised by the unmarried mother.

3.  Along the same lines as number 2, Children who were adopted are more likely to have physical or emotional challenges.  MYTH.  It is impossible to predict how any child will turn out, whether biological or adopted. Generally, children who were adopted as infants are as emotionally healthy as children who were not adopted. Children who were adopted when older may have challenges resulting from adverse conditions in their early lives, such as neglect, abuse, or lack of attachment. These challenges do not result from the adoption itself.

4.  An adoptive parent cannot love a child as much as a biological parent can.  MYTH.  MYTH.  MYTH.  Love is not based on biology. Many loving relationships are between individuals who are not related to each other, such as husbands and wives. The love of a parent comes from preparing for a child and selflessly nurturing and caring for that child.  I have to add my own testimony that this is absolutely true. 

5.  After a child has been placed, a birth mother cannot have any contact with the child.  MYTH.  Adoption practices have changed over the years. Today most birth mothers have some contact with their biological children. Arrangements are agreed upon by the birth mother and the adoptive parents and are based upon the needs and desires of all concerned.

Adoption has been a wonderful blessing in my own life and I feel so so lucky to have my beautiful son, Noah, because of it.  It is so important for us to educate the people around us about these myths.  People tend to be very curious about adoption and I'm now asked a lot about some of these topics.  It can be frustrating sometimes when people have miconstrued views but what better way to kill these myths than to educate people when the topics come up!